Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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