My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Randomize