Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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