Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize