Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
my liver is dry heaving
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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