So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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