He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
what is it with giant penises always finding me
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Randomize
