I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
The iPhone is ruining my ability to sex message. My 5-year-old cousin just picked up my phone at my grandmas birthday party and read "I wanna stand you up and fuck you from behind" to my entire extended family bc of popped up on my screen
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
