butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
