Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize
