Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
where are my eyebrows?
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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