we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Randomize