I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
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