Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
