marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Randomize
