We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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