This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
Randomize