How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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