if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize