It's like God shit irony all over that family
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
He's on the porch naked. Help.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize
