So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize