So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Randomize
