I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
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