i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Randomize
