The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
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