My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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