my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize