no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Randomize
