speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Randomize
