Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
