ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
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