Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Randomize
