You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
