If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
