K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Rock
Scissors
Fuck
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Randomize
