I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
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