I wish I could punch you in the face.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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