yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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