Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
he high fived his dick after we had sex
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
