Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
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