yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Verdict: uncircumcised.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
