He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Randomize
