We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
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