I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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