Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
Randomize
