My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize
