so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
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