Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
I still have a little drunk in my system
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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