i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Randomize
