Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
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