There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
so let's talk penis.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Randomize
