isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Randomize
